Rich Satire – Celebrity Pitchman

Hello again!

Rich Satire here with a unique Debt Consolidation and Credit Repair plan developed by the Accountants at Crappo Financial Services.

Let’s face it, there’s a credit card debt crisis going on in this Country and Americans need to go on a Debt Diet. Even Oprah’s talking about Debt Diets these days.. And where Oprah see’s an opportunity, the folks over at Crappo Financial see one too.

Disclaimer: This is not an Endorsement by Oprah Winfrey, when you’ve got Rich Satire, who needs Oprah?

So when Crappo asked me to promote their CiKem Credit Repair System, I jumped at the chance to possibly be on Oprah, if this sucker actually worked..

Onto the CiKem system.

Perhaps you’re like Bill from Michigan

“Rich, I can’t pay my bills on time….can you help me consolidate my debt?”

Or Cindy from Kentucky

Rich I’m only making minimum payments each month, will I ever be able to afford a new trailer?.

Or J.T. from Florida

Rich can you help get around rising Strip Club ATM fees?

Or Destiny from Florida

Rich, J.T. told me how to find you… I’m late. Please call!

Well, I’m here to tell you the answer is Yes, Yes, Yes, and Destiny, you must have me confused with my twin brother Poor.

First let me tell you what’s contained in this AMAZING SYSTEM!

12 DVD’s on Money Management

Including

10 Audio CD’s on Debt Consolidation
5 WorkBooks on Credit Repair
1 BetaMax Tape on the Hottest Stocks of the 1970’s (used)

But Most Importantly you get the CIKem Mantra absolutely free..

The CIKem Mantra is what we’ll set you on the path to being Debt Free!

Sure there are other programs out there… but this is the simplest…

This system is so easy to use I can’t wait to share it with you..

First off… What does “CIK” stand for… Well it simply means “Cash is King”

Let’s say you’re at a Clothing Store making a purchase when a sweet young girl with the name tag “Suzy” at the counter asks the following….

“Would you like to receive 10% off your order by applying for our Store Credit Card”

Before you respond to her I want you to visualize my two PitBulls at your side, their names are Rambo and Dahmer…

Now politely say “No Thank You, I prefer to pay Cash”

If she says “But you could save $10 on this purchase”

At this point, I want you to visualize Rambo and Dahmer jumping over the Counter and tearing the flesh from Suzy’s bones, as she tries to use the microphone to call for a Manager, I want you to visualize never ever receiving a monthly bill from this Store or having to make monthly payments with 25% interest tacked onto your purchase.

Then… Relax… and say.. “Cash is King Suzy, No Thank You”

That’s the CIKem Mantra… when someone trys to sell you a credit card offer… just say CIKem!

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YOU CAN HAVE THE COMPLETE CIKEM SYSTEM FOR JUST $199.95

But if you’d like to order today we have a Special Offer for you..
Available Today Only..

Just signup for our Exclusive Crappo Products Credit Card with 0% APR for the first 30 Hours or 30 MONTHS, whichever comes first..

You’ll save 10% on YOUR FIRST ORDER!!!
AND… If you make minimum payments for the next 5 years, at the end of Five Years, we will send you the New and Improved CIKem Money Management System…AUTOMATICALLY… And we’ll knock 10% of that order, just for being a Loyal Customer!!!

Order TODAY!!!

THIS IS A PARODY SITE – DO NOT ATTEMPT TO ORDER – IT’S A JOKE

Looking for Real Credit Repair Products? Click Here!